


Winter Solitude

by orphan_account



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: M/M, Spirits, mention of an original character bc i didnt want to make a canon-character evil, not the alcoholic kind, slight angst, slight depression/lonerism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-05
Updated: 2017-01-05
Packaged: 2018-09-14 21:49:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9204749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Victor was cursed by a fellow competitor many years ago, jealous of his skills on the ice. The curse limited Victor to a lake in Hasetsu, Japan, where he appears to others as a blue-tinted human.He can't age. He can't leave. And he can't let himself feel emotions for the pain it causes.But a skater comes to the frozen lake one day and ignites a fire in his heart that he hadn't felt in years.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little AU-ish thing I thought up.

Victor was a champion figure skater years before his existence was cursed by a fellow competitor - Freezing him and attaching his life to a lake in Hasetsu, Japan.

He had been competing in a figure skating competition in Hasetsu years ago when an angry competitor - jealous of his finesse and skill on the ice, froze his body and transformed it to a semi-human state, appearing as a blue-tinged human, but a tangible human to those who if they were brave enough to touch him. Victor was unable to age, and also unable to remove himself from the vicinity of the lake - trapped by the curse.

His permanent existence at the lake started rumours in the town of Hasetsu. That the lake was haunted and a mysterious spirit guarded it; frightening locals and tourists away from it for years.

Osborne Koehl placed the curse upon Victor, full of rage and resentment towards Victor and his skating. Osborne was a social outcast also competing in the competition, and Victor’s gracefulness and success on the ice was something Osborne knew he could never achieve. In a moment of rage, he cursed Victor after the competition that he lost, and submitted Victor to a life on the ice, living with it, unable to change form or appearance. Victor was dressed in his competition outfit, a fitted blazer with chains decorating the shoulder-pads of the jacket. He would remain in this state for many years to come. 

Years later, Osborne and all the people Victor used to know had long passed away, and the surroundings of Hasetsu had been modernized with new buildings being formed and built along the newly paved streets that Victor could view above the treeline surrounding the lake, and hearing the distant noises during the nights. 

But Victor and the frozen lake in winter remained one-in-the-same - tied with nature and unable to escape the unbreakable evil curse that was placed on him.

Victor’s existence crushed him over the many years. The life and love he held for his previous life fading from his memories, as he neglected to encourage the thoughts that he held inside in the fear of them fading further. His love for skating remained, but he failed to compose a performance without his emotions, pieces lacking feeling and heart. Occasionally his composure broke, and out poured pure emotion, pent up for years, but this didn’t happen often. It hurt too much.

Victor remained alone for many years, skating casual rings around the large frozen lake and observing the few visitors to the lake over the years, never quite intrigued with any of them. They all came to look at the trees or the lake in the summer sun. 

Until a young man, a few years Victor’s junior by the looks of his appearances, approached the frozen lake one bright winter’s day with skates in his right hand and his body bundled up with thick winter clothing. Victor was curious, as he hadn’t seen anyone else skating on the lake he resides over in many, many years.

The man had thick black hair and soft brown eyes. Average height and features. He was a riveting sight to Victor as he watched the man go about his business on the edge of the frozen lake.

Remaining silent and standing behind a tree on the opposite side of the lake, Victor observed as the young man removed his running shoes and tied his skates onto his feet, then stepped onto the ice, closing his eyes as he got a feel of the ice of the lake under his body.

Victor was stunned into silence as the young man started to skate what appeared to be a routine, a faint sound of music bellowing from a phone left over near his previously worn boots on a bench at the edge of the ice. The movements were pensive but calming, as if cathartic to the man. Victor observed as he watched the man continue his routine, straightening his body and rotating in delicate spins, graceful and beautiful. Jumps were attempted, a simple double toe and triple axle the extent of his attempts.

This continued for a few short hours, the skater continuing to practice different jumps, movements and compositions to different music. He looked carefree on the ice, and Victor felt a pang in his heart, something that he hadn’t felt in many years. The feeling shocked him, and he gasped to himself as he retreated further into the treeline, waiting for the feeling to fade from inside his body.

It never did.

 

* * *

 

The skater returned to the ice every day at the same time for weeks, early in the morning just after the sun rose in the sky. Victor always observed, and never interacted with the skater. He liked it that way - the pain in his chest always an ever-present feeling, never easing or fading completely.

One morning however, Victor felt the need to skate to ease the feeling of pain inside of him. He always used skating as a method to portray his feelings, the movements on the ice a symbol for what he was thinking in his mind, a frame for his feelings. 

He returned to the ice early one morning, the sun just creeping above the skyline. In the semi-darkness Victor closed his eyes and skated a routine he only had the basic framework of. He started the routine by looking straight up at the sky, _pleading_ to be released from this torture, and moving his hands down his face, twisting his body and completing jumps and spins as if begging to not be left alone, to draw in _something or anyone_.

He was tired of this lonely existence by himself. He wished for his previous life during that skate. For the people he previously knew to rejoin him, keep him company and fill the void in his life that was cruelly created when he was cursed. That was the only life he had known. 

He skated this routine with music in his mind - an Italian singer proclaiming lyrics of loneliness and urging companionship for the rest of his life. Victor wanted that. He _needed_ the feeling of completeness again. He had lost his life and love that he previously held, and he wished for nothing more than to regain those feelings. He believed he could only create new memories and experiences by himself on the frozen lake he dwells at, never knowing that in the future there was a person out there who could break his curse and re-teach him what it feels like to have life and love once more.

 

* * *

 

Victor continued to skate this routine every morning at first light, finding solace and peace in the now familiar movements and actions.

After skating this routine so many times and perfecting the performance, Victor was desperate for company. Desperate to have someone to cling to, to share his thoughts with. To see his skating.

He always used to perform in-front of crowds of fans and colleagues, watching him in awe. But now his existence was a heavy burden, unable to escape or hide from the reality he was subjected to.

 

* * *

 

Victor continued to watch the mysterious man’s skating every morning he was at the frozen lake. One morning Victor moved to the edge of the treeline and observed the jumps the skater was practicing that day.

That morning he was practicing a quad flip, but failing every attempt abysmally. Victor was pained watching him fall after every attempt, noticing the small mistakes that he made as he prepared for the jump, whilst he was in the air and during the landing.

Seeing a key opportunity to grasp at some kind of interaction, he skated out gently onto the ice after the skater suffered a particularly bad fall, laying on the ice and rubbing his upper thigh to relieve the pain in his sore muscles.

“I can see where you’re going wrong with this jump. Your core isn’t tight enough when you take-off and your position is all wrong when you land. That’s why you’ve been falling. 

The skater let out a sharp, loud gasp and scampers away from the voice, crawling in the direction away from Victor.

“If you tighten your abdomen and straighten your skates at the end of the fourth rotation, you’ll land the jump much more often”, Victor continued, as he slowly skated towards the man sitting up on the ice.

“W-what the-” the man whispered to himself, his eyes growing larger with fright as his body tensed from shock as he observed Victor, the human man whose entire figure was icy blue and _strange_.

“Hello! I’m Victor Nikiforov, nice to meet you!” Victor said cheerily, finally glad to talk to someone after so many years of solitude and ignoring the frightened expression in the skaters eyes.

A squeaked “H-ello” was all the skater stammered out as he shot up from the ice and hurriedly skated to the edge to collect his shoes and phone that lay there. Before Victor could even move one step closer, the skater had gathered his items and rushed out of the vicinity of the lake, beyond Victor’s boundary. 

He stood on the ice, alone. Again.

Victor wasn’t a religious man, but he prayed that day for the skater to return to him.

 

* * *

  

Victor continued to skate his routine, now with a fire in his belly and a desperate flow to his movements on the ice.

Yet the skater still didn’t return to the lake.

 

* * *

 

Winter had ended and the lakes ice had broken and melted, making way for warm blue water during the summer months.

Victor remained alone.

 

* * *

 

The return of winter was eagerly awaited by Victor, itching to be able to return to the ice he felt comfortable on.

As the temperatures dropped and the lakes water began to crystallize and freeze over, Victor breathed a sigh of relief as he skated onto the ice for the first time that season. Summer months were always the most difficult for Victor. He disliked the summer and preferred the ice and snow that winter brings along with it.

When he lived in Russia, St. Petersburg was a beautiful sight to see. The tall, grand buildings covered in a delicate dusting of snow, but by the end of winter became blanketed with ice. He missed Russia. He missed his previous home.

Victor skated out onto the lake as the sun rose over the trees, frozen over completely after autumn. The feeling of ice beneath his skates was a remarkable feeling, one he had missed during the previous months.

He stood straight and still, raising his eyes to the sky, a small smile playing along his lips as he rejoiced in the freeing feeling of skating again. He brought his hands down over his face and elegantly pushed off his right skate, and skated the routine he had perfected the previous winter, humming the accompanying music to his movements. Proclaiming to the winter to stay with him, to have his surroundings remain in this state forever.

And for the skater to return to him and share in his joy of skating on ice.

He wished for the man to return, to allow him the chance to see him skate again.

A faint rustle of branches and leaves from the trees could be heard, but the lake still remained silent.

 

* * *

 

Victor had his wishes and prayers answered two days later as the skater returned to the lake, skates in hand once-more. His heart sang with the now-familiar feeling in his chest at the sight.

He didn’t want to force another reaction out of the man again like in their first meeting where he frightened him. Victor decided to remain in the shadows of the trees, watching as the man made his way to the centre of the lake and raise his face to the sky.

The skater then moved his hands over his face and pushed off a skate as he glided forwards on the ice and……. Victor’s eyes widened and breathe left his lungs as he _realised_.

This is his routine. The pleading skate offered out as a letter to anyone who was able to hear him. His routine. 

He watched as the skater completed every turn, twist and jump to stunning perfection. His expression was calm but determined - a force to be reckoned with. He moved with grace and poise. The skaters body at every movement sounded out notes of music that Victor only heard in his head when he skated this routine, as if the skater was the source of the music itself.

Victor didn’t intrude, didn’t move a muscle but only observed in silence as he stared in awe at the display in front of him. 

The skater finished the routine, not out of breath and no apparently feeling of exhaustion in his expression. He just simply pushed off the ice on his skates once the routine was completed, and gathered his items as he swapped his skates for his running shoes and exited the lake enclosure, leaving Victor in a mess of feelings he hasn’t felt in numerous years.

His heart felt like it was beating a steady pulse for the first time. It felt like a new feeling to him again. 

He eagerly awaited the return of the skater once more. This time he would carefully construct his approach. His appearance was frightening at first. But it appears the skater would expect his appearance the next time. 

The skater had seen his routine when Victor was practicing it and skated it better and with more feeling than Victor ever could. Victor felt as if his heart physically jumped in his body at that thought, his entire body growing faintly warmer with this feeling. 

On this day, Victor felt human again.

 

* * *

 

The sight of the skater returning to the lake the very next morning was not a surprise to Victor, but he still grew in excitement at the fact of his appearance. 

The skater was fixing his laces on his skates when Victor gathered the courage to step out of the shadows and onto the ice for the skater to see.

Victor stepped out with no expectations, but a warm heart inside of him guided him to the other side of the ice and a few metres away from the skater.

The skater raised his head and at the sight of Victor standing in-front of him, he flashed a small, shy smile, hesitance vivid in his eyes - unsure of what was going to occur.

“Hello”, the skater said flawlessly, as the hesitance washed out of his eyes and a certain level of confidence now replaced it.

Victor’s heart jumped at the friendly greeting, and smiled a brilliant and bright smile back at the man.

“Hello! I’m Victor Nikiforov…. and I believe we’ve met before?” he offered flirtatiously, testing the waters.

A small chuckle arose from the skater, now rising to his feet off the bench and he skated past Victor on the ice, turning around to face him. “I’m Yuuri Katsuki” he offered in a friendly tone, as he pushed back on his skates and completed a single spin on the ice, getting comfortable in the setting again.

Victor finally had a name for the man. The skater. Yuuri.

“It’s a great pleasure to meet you, Yuuri.”

 

* * *

 

They skated in silence for a few moments, not quite sure who was going to say what.

“You’re the spirit of the lake, aren’t you?” Yuuri suddenly said.

“I am.” Victor whispered his answer, hanging his head to face the ice as he staked further away from Yuuri, afraid of his reaction.

There was a quiet silence for many moments, but Victor broke the silence as his curiosity won over, skating closer to Yuuri as he warmed up on the ice with some stretches.

“I saw your performance yesterday.” 

Yuuri blushed at the words, unsure of what Victor’s reaction would be.

Victor decided to keep talking. “It was beautiful. Your body created music and told the story better than I ever could. Your feelings were clear in every movement. It was beautiful” Victor stated firmly, not allowing Yuuri to shy away from the truth.

“Th-thank you, that means a lot to me.” He took a deep breath, the blush never leaving his cheeks as he breathed in the winter air. “I accidentally saw you performing it a few days ago, and I taught myself the routine to challenge myself. I didn’t know if you were watching or not, but I enjoyed skating it. I haven’t enjoyed skating in many years” he declared, lowering his eyes away from Victor.

“I know that feeling all too well.” Victor has never talked about this to anyone during his time spent at the lake, having never connected to anything or anyone.

“Can I ask you a question?” Yuuri asks gently, skating closer to Victor.

Victor just nodded, accepting any question that Yuuri would direct his way.

Yuuri remained silent for a moment. “H-how did you end up here? At the lake?” - he paused for a moment, checking Victor’s reaction. “How did you turn into…. What you are? I've heard people in town talking about you as if they're afraid you'll hurt them.... But I've been intrigued by your existence.”

Victor smiled at the question. Yuuri asked it so politely, he wasn’t afraid of Victor. He was just curious.

Victor took one deep breath before answering, gliding softly over the ice, Yuuri keeping his eyes on him. “Many years ago I used to figure skate in competitions. I lived many years ago, long before you were even thought about. I was fantastic. I was the best in the world, and people flocked from all over to see me and my performances. The fans loved me…. But my competitors loved me less-so. I’d just won a competition at this lake, when a jealous competitor lashed out at me and placed a curse on me.”

“He tied my existence to the lake here, I cannot leave due to the curse. He turned me into a semi-human being. I am human, but I cannot age, grow, injure or die. I’m a mortal human in an immortal body.” Victor fell silent after these words, feeling a small part of his burden lifting from his shoulders after finally being able to tell someone what he is.

But he also now burdened sweet Yuuri with the truth of his existence. It was a truly selfish thing to do and sudden shame fell upon him, worse than the previous feeling of burden.

“I-I’m sorry Yuuri, you shouldn’t have had to hear that.” Victor felt the guilt eating at him, as if he just broke the feeling he had regained in his heart at seeing Yuuri skate.

Victor skated quickly away from Yuuri, ashamed of his existence.

“Hey! Wait!” Yuuri yelled at the retreating figure of Victor.

Yuuri caught up with Victor at the edge of the ice, near the treeline. He reached for Victor’s left hand, and held it firmly in his hand.

This movement froze Victor, as warmth rushed through his body like a fire in a trail of oil. He turned his face to look at Yuuri, Victor’s eyes wide and his body shaking from shock of being touched for the first time in years.

Victor turned around to face Yuuri, his heart beating fast and loud in his ears. He looked at his left hand that Yuuri had touched, as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.

“I-I’m so sorry, Victor. I didn’t mean to do that! I.... I’m okay with what you are. With who you are. I didn’t mean to offend you” Yuuri admitted shyly to Victor, his sudden bravery at reaching out to grasp Victor’s hand now completely gone.

However, Victor was still staring at his hand, the blue-tinted limb that felt like it was on alight in a ferocious fire. His heart was beating fast, Victor couldn’t hear any noise other than his breathing, his heartbeat and the words Yuuri spoke to him. He couldn’t focus. His world was in a daze and he felt _overwhelmed_. So very overwhelmed.

Victor raised his eyes to look at Yuuri in shock, but Yuuri was looking at Victor’s left hand with intense curiosity.

“Oh my…. God” Yuuri rasped out, raising a hand to cover the gasp that rang out of his mouth unexpectedly.

Yuuri raised his other arm and pointed at Victor’s left hand that he held in-front of him. And _Victor noticed it._

His hand wasn’t blue anymore. The same shade of blue that he has been for so many years. His skin was white on his hand now. A bright, fresh white that he faintly remembers having years before.

The white skin was overcoming the blue tinge as Victor and Yuuri gasped in shock watching it unfold.

The colour extended to the tips of his fingers slowly, as Victor stretched his hand in every direction to look at the shocking change come over his body. He now looked at Yuuri with the largest, purest smile of complete happiness that has ever come over his features as they both continued to watch the colour spread over his entire left hand and start to spread upwards, turning the sleeve of Victor’s skating outfit the darkest shade of black Victor has ever seen.

“Oh my god!” Victor cried out in shock as the colour overwhelmed his body, the feeling inside his chest shaking him to his core as his body continued to burn. Victor sunk to his knees on the ice, bringing his hands to cover his face as his entire body burnt in incredible pain.

Victor yelled and groaned, Yuuri watching in-front of his in concern. Yuuri cautiously approached Victor’s shaking, fragile form that was changing colour, displaying deep fuschia and pinks along with gold on the shoulders.

“Victor! Victor are you okay? What’s happening?!” Yuuri yelled out, trying to get Victor’s attention, but nothing was working. Yuuri decided to grip Victor’s shoulders to attempt to shake Victor to _look at him_ so he could see if he was okay. Any response at the moment that wasn’t deep groans of apparent pain.

But in shock, Yuuri just looked on and kept his hands on Victor’s shoulders as the colour spread across Victor’s body, the blue being eradicated slowly.

The hair on Victor’s head was turning a shiny silver, the brightest Yuuri had ever seen. Victor’s skin was milk white, but not looking frail and delicate. His clothes were now fully coloured - a mix of blacks on the pants,  gold rope twisted into vines on the shoulders, which were a pink and fuchsia combination on the tail of the blazer.

Victor was _gorgeous_. Yuuri’s breath ripped out of his lungs.

But Yuuri still looked at Victor with concern, as Victor’s shaking subsided and his body sagged from exhaustion. “Victor?” Yuuri whispered, not wanting to overwhelm a shocked Victor that had gone limp in-front of him, hands still covering his face as Victor sagged over his knees, and his face directed towards the ice below.

The space around them fell quiet as Victor’s groaning and painful cries ended. The only noise was Yuuri’s rapid, worried breathing.

Yuuri tightened his grip on Victor’s shoulders, and shook him gently. Yuuri was crouching in-front of Victor, concern visible on his features. “Victor _please, just look at me so I can see you’re okay!”_ Yuuri begged, his voice thick with concern.

Victor’s body stiffened at the words, the pain his body was in having passed now.

Under Yuuri’s grip, Victor let out a deep sigh. And another. And another. His hands still covering his face as if he was afraid of what he would see if he opened his eyes.

“Victor…. _Please”_ Yuuri begged furthermore, desperation now overflowing in his voice.

And with this, Victor raised his face, his body setting into a straight position, knees folded underneath his body still.

And he removed his hands from his face, and if Yuuri didn’t have air left in his lungs from before, they’ve surely collapsed within his chest now.

 _They were so blue_ …. _And looking directly at him._ Victor’s eyes were staring directly into Yuuri’s, wide and fearful. Yuuri just stared at Victor, never breaking eye contact with him.

While he held his gaze, Yuuri observed. They were the brightest shade of blue that Yuuri had ever seen in his life, making him emit a short gasp of air that was knocked out of him.

“Are… you okay?” Yuuri says again after a few moments.

Victor still looked shocked, but he snapped out of it soon after, the air between them still quiet and tense. “I-I-I don’t know” Victor’s voice shook out the few words, as he pulled Yuuri’s body closer to him, threw his arms around Yuuri’s neck and just _hugged him_.

Yuuri eventually replicated Victor’s hold, and wrapped his arms around Victor’s shoulders to hold Victor close to him for what felt like hours.

Eventually, Victor let go a little bit and rested his head on Yuuri’s shoulder, turning his head to face Yuuri’s neck and spoke into the skin there.

“Yuuri…. I feel _alive_ again.” Victor said the words with a breathless voice of surprise and pure, unadulterated happiness, and warmth rose in Victor’s body, his heart beating loud in his ears as he felt the blood circulate around his body. He felt dizzy and sick, but never so _alive_.

A faint damp feeling could be felt on Yuuri’s shoulder where Victor’s head was resting, and Yuuri recognised the feeling and soft sound to be crying. Victor was _crying_. The fragile body in his grasp started to shake as Victor came to terms with the changes that just occurred to him.

When the tears stopped, Victor raised his head to look directly into Yuuri’s eyes. “Thank you” Victor whispered to Yuuri with a small smile on his lips, tear tracks running down his cheeks. They weren’t sad tears, Yuuri realised.

_Victor was happy._

“Victor, what was that? What happened to you?”

“-I-I’m free, Yuuri. You freed me” Victor said through his tears, hugging Yuuri around the shoulders again. “You released me from the curse.”

Yuuri let out a gasp of shock, as he felt tears fall down his cheeks too.

“You saved me, Yuuri. I’m a free man thanks to you.... I can live and love again”, Victor sobbed through heavier tears now.

Victor breathed a deep breath again, and spoke gently into Yuuri’s ear, quiet enough for only both of them to hear. “Stay close to me” Victor whispered tenderly and placed a gently and chaste kiss on Yuuri’s cheek, as Yuuri replied with a nod of his head and hugged Victor tight again, not wishing to ever let him go.

Victor was now living in vibrant colour.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this! Thank you for reading!
> 
> A few end-notes to clear up some of the background/theory in this:
> 
> \- In my head Yuuri exists in 2016/17, or whenever the show is set. Victor in this fic is competing/cursed in the 1930's or 1950's.  
> \- Victor is unable to be invisible, but he's at a remote location so it doesn't matter as he rarely had people come into the lake enclosure.  
> \- Yuuri is still a GPF/figure skater competitively, and this is set when he returns to Hasetsu after his failure in the GPF. He wasn't at Ice Castle due to wanting the peace and quiet, and Ice Castle (in my head) is too busy for his liking.  
> \- In my head they speak English as Victor doesn't know Japanese, nor Yuuri Russian. So English it is.
> 
>  
> 
> Hope that clears up some of the world of this fic! If you enjoyed it, please leave kudos, share, comment and tell me your thoughts! Thank you :)


End file.
